(NOAH) Event Recap ~ "CAGE WAR" (26th June 2021)

Noah are good at rising to the occasion during times of crisis, it's something the promotion was founded on, and turning a crisis into an opportunity today they took advantage of the chance to test the water so to speak by holding their very first cage match. I don't think this will be their last, and I think we will see another which will be in front of a live audience. The event was streamed through ABEMA, FITE and WRESTLEUNIVERSE. Following feedback from WrestleUniverse subscribers about the long delay of half an hour while ABEMA ran their pre-show, Noah gave their international fans their own small pre-show with the two English commentators, Mark Pickering and Stewart Fulton, hosting. 

MATCH ONE

Manabu Soya vs Kinya Okada

Kinya Okada has the potential to be the same size and shape as Manabu Soya, lined up they are very similar. Okada managed to knock Soya down with kicks and shoulder tackles, and although he later got better at them later on in the match, his kicks lacked the force of personality behind them compared to Katsuhiko Nakajima (enjoys hurting his opponent) and Kenoh (generally angry), and came across as a bit too polite. Okada, however, should be given praise for other areas of the match, particularly his refusal to quit to Soya even when he had him a Boston Crab and he was pulled back from the ropes, and he almost even nearly got the win at one point. Okada put up such a fight that Soya couldn't believe this boy was still going, so he pulled out the big guns. 

WINNER ~ Manabu Soya with the Death Valley Bomb (11 minutes, 22 seconds)

MATCH TWO

STINGER (Yosinari Oawa & HAYATA) vs Kai Fujimura & Yasutaka Yano

Yoshinari Ogawa paused at the top of the ramp and pointed out the drone camera to HAYATA. HAYATA, who hates being photographed or filmed, was less than excited to hear there was something flying around the arena that could get close to him, and hid even more behind his hood and mask. 

It is probably no coincidence that this match comes after the dojo match (plus it also gave the impression that STINGER were over and done with for the evening), and it was very much an Ogawa Classroom as no doubt Ogawa wanted to assess them both. Yasutaka Yano had said he was excited about showing (Ogawa) what he could do, and he got the chance as he started first against him. As half the match where rookies, and the other half a veteran and someone vastly more experienced, naturally the match was dominated by STINGER, and Yano got his first experience of fighting his teacher. 

WINNER: HAYATA with the Moonsault on Kai Fujimura (8 minutes, 36 seconds)

MATCH THREE

The Sugiura Army vs Funky Express Elimination Match

(Takashi Sugiura, Kazushi Sakuraba, Kendo Kashin & Kazunari Murakami vs Mohammed Yone, Shuhei Taniguchi, Akitoshi Saito & Masao Inoue)

Kendo Kashin set the tone for this match by coming out attacking the smoke from the machines at the entry, while Kazushi Sakuraba wore his belt around his neck. All of this was in strong contrast to Kongoh later in the evening who lined up like soldiers for the cage match later after coming marching out after Kenoh (but more on that, and Kenoh's startling suit later). Either because his own unit didn't like him (and Kashin would find out just how popular he was with everyone) or because Funky Express objected to his mace, Kashin started the match and Funky Express attacked en masse as if this was a Noah Junior match. Only Kazunari Murakami made an attempt to come to Kashin's rescue, and then Kashin found that no one wanted to tag in. 

There was only one way out of this situation that Kashin could think of. It was to eliminate himself, but Takashi Sugiura stopped him and he was returned to the ring. Trying to get out in Funky Express's corner also didn't work, they stopped him. 

Masao Inoue lives a rough life, and not just in the ring. Outside the ring he finds himself the subject of Takashi Sugiura's camera, innuendo's made against him, his gout mocked and his most private moments posted to 23.4k followers, so naturally today Inoue got a small measure of revenge with mainly eye pokes and eye rakes. If the humiliation of being subject to Inoue wasn't bad enough, then Sugiura could count on no help from his own unit as Murakami was eliminated early on, Sakuraba (who has never understood the rules of an elimination match), eliminated himself by jumping over the top rope and Kashin eventually escaped the ring by throwing himself out after Sugi accidentally hit him with a clothesline. Sugi threatened retribution as he was now alone facing Disco dancers, and he's on record saying he doesn't like Disco. Kashin remained outside the ring being very helpful, swiping at Inoue. After a period of being beaten down by Funky Express, Sugi rallied eliminating Mohammed Yone and Akitoshi Saito. Things didn't look so pink for Inoue after that, and he tried to run from Sugi but Taniguchi wouldn't let him and he had to undergo shoulder tackles, and Sugi bouncing him off the ropes. In the end he threw him out, which left on Sugi and Tani.

WINNER: Takashi Sugiura with the Frankensteiner on Shuhei Taniguchi (22 minutes, 40 seconds)

Kashin continued his helpful ways after the match, by hurrying in and bringing the AED (defibrillator) box with him and even doing a heart massage, which wasn't really a comfortable thing for him to have been doing given both Sugi's heart problems and what happened to Misawa. Kashin's dramatic concern was not appreciated as Sugi shook hands with Murakami, took it up with Sakuraba (who was once again giggling) about his dive earlier and ignored Kashin. Typical chaos from The Sugiura Army.

Backstage, Funky Express all agreed that their problems were caused by a lack of leadership and they needed to have a match to determine just who that leader would be. Since the word cursed FULL THROTTLE, Taniguchi said it wasn't a leader they would choose, it would be a "King". The duel to determine who will rule Funky Express, will take place on the 27th June at "MUTA the WORLD". 

MATCH FOUR

The M's alliance (Naomichi Marufuji & Masaaki Mochizuki) vs Kaito Kiyomiya & Yoshiki Inamura

Yoshiki Inamura came out carrying his tire, while Kaito Kiyomiya came out with his usual air of gloom. Ogawa's euphoria had been short lived. 

Masaaki Mochizuki faced off against Inamura and found he was fighting a wall, and who threw him around effortlessly. What was needed was to take down the foundations by kicks and chops to the legs, attacking anything above that didn't work. 

Kiyomiya had his moments, but on the whole he was eclipsed by Yoshiki Inamura who is rolling on a high at the moment, and after the match was seen to have slid off of Inamura's shoulder and was sitting on the floor hopelessly. 

WINNER: Masaaki Mochizuki with the Triangular Kick on Yoshiki Inamura (18 minutes, 30 seconds)   

MATCH FIVE

Ten man Junior Battle Royale, winner will challenge Atsushi Kotoge for the GHC Junior Heavyweight Championship

These were the billed competitors. 

Daisuke Harada 

Hajime Ohara

Junta Miyawaki

Seiki Yoshioka

Haoh

Nioh

Tadasuke

NOSAWA

Ikuto Hidaka

Eita

Naturally, this being the Noah Juniors, it didn't turn out this way. 

At the start of the match, Atsushi Kotoge came out and took his place at ringside to watch what was going to happen as Daisuke Harada came out first and NOSAWA second. Eita came out third, making a "You!" motion and beckoning to Harada. Hair pulling and double teaming followed. Help for Harada arrived in the unlikely form of Seiki Yoshioka (4th) and then Junta Miyawaki (5th). Miyawaki dropkicked everyone down, and then came a surprise entry, the first, but not the last. 

YO-HEY was number 6 (and if you listened carefully, you could hear Noah Twitter screaming as fans had been concerned as to why he hadn't been advertised for any shows). YO-HEY and his new darker look, went straight for Seiki Yoshioka. Yoshioka would later comment bitterly that the irritant had returned.

Kongoh came out in a mob, Hajime Ohara was next (by this time numbers had flown out of the window), Yuya Susumu (another person not advertised in a "ten man rumble", but then again no self respecting Noah Junior passes up a rumble), Ikuto Hidaka, and then Kotaro Suzuki. So, with what looked like all the participating Noah Juniors in the ring things got down to usual fashion i.e. mass brawls inside and outside the ring. 

Then HAYATA and Yoshinari Ogawa decided to enter, and casually threw Daisuke Harada and NOSAWA Rongai out. before Kotaro Suzuki and Ogawa got into it with HAYATA legally double teaming him. The ref, ignoring this and Tadasuke and Yoshioka grappling on the ropes, concentrated on Miyawaki and Haoh. Miyawaki managed two eliminations (Haoh and Nioh) before being eliminated himself. 

Eita and Ogawa were set loose on each other, with Eita being eliminated by Ogawa.

YO-HEY eliminated Yoshioka. 

NOSAWA helped Kotaro eliminate Ogawa, and with other Noah Juniors going out either before or after, this left HAYATA, Kotaro and YO-HEY, which came down to HAYATA and YO-HEY. Despite the fight he put up against his former tag partner, today was not the day when YO-HEY would finally beat HAYATA.   

WINNER: HAYATA with the Headache (35 minutes)

So HAYATA (who was not originally in the rumble, but who always seems to do well in rumbles or elimination matches), had won a shot at the title, which he looked anything but pleased about. Atsushi Kotoge told HAYATA (after HAYATA had awkwardly paced the ring after STINGER had left, and pointed to the belt)

"HAYATA, I don't think you will talk, but I think you have intensity. My current intention and momentum can never be stopped! It is my role to create the current Noah Junior".

HAYATA once said that he does his talking in the ring, and in response to Kotoge he did just that by pointing again to the belt when Kotoge held it up, attacking him and then draping the belt over him before leaving. 

MATCH SIX

Cage match, loser has his head shaved

Katsuhiko Nakajima vs Masa Kitamiya

After a brief interlude while the cage was assembled, Kenoh (wearing a startling red suit and waistcoat), led Kongoh out to the ring. Kenoh did the honors of locking the cage door, keeping the key and sitting at ringside behind the tag belts watching. Not once did a smile cross his face. Katsuhiko Nakajima on the other hand had his broad evil smile splashed all over his. Dominant during the first half, and looking for the cameras, he kicked Masa Kitamiya extra hard. To Nakajima this was going to be easy, but the ref thought otherwise and refused to count his cocky pin. The tide of the match turned when Kitamiya fought back with vicious headbutts that busted both him and Nakajima open, blood dripped everywhere, but still Nakajima's smile didn't fade. He was enjoying it. Nakajima returned a couple of headbutts of his own after Kitamiya did a top of the cage Samoan Drop, which destroyed some of the ring boards below, and to be fair it was 103kgs crashing down. 

Worn down and ground down, the match came down to pure adrenaline and Kitamiya found he had something on his side. Nakajima's ego which has cost him matches in the past, and would cost him today. Sauntering around the ring, his arms outstretched was just the opportunity that Kitamiya needed to rally and the added bonus of Nakajima shoving the ref aside helped. Two Saito Slams cost both Nakajima the match and his hair. 

WINNER: Masa Kitamiya with the Saito Slam (32 minutes and 4 seconds)

Kenoh unlocked the door and came in to check on Nakajima. Nakajima was not going to run, he would take his punishment and make out he was enjoying it. Kitamiya was not going to have the satisfaction of seeing him downcast, and so he sat in the chair as if he were at the barbershop and let Kitamiya cut his hair. Kitamiya started with scissors, cutting off clumps and taking a handful and throwing them to the floor. He then moved on to the electric razor, which he found Nakajima's hair was still too thick for, and after using it to cut off strands, he left taking his half of the tag belts with him. Inside the ring, Nakajima asked Kenoh to finish the job. Nakajima later posted on Twitter that he felt "refreshed", Kitamiya wondered why he was "laughing like a idiot", and said backstage that it was not over between them. No one came for the tag championships tonight, and the issue remains unsettled as the two have matches against each other for the foreseeable future. They will either have to give the belts up, something both are refusing to do, or the day will come when they have to defend them together. 

With thanks to: Flame286, Metal Noah

Picture Credit: Official Noah Twitter

GIFs taken from WrestleUniverse