(NOAH) Event recap - RATELS produce, ShinKiba 1st Ring (30th June 2018)

"It's really nice to be able to smile like this by watching Pro Wrestling."
(Fan Twitter comment)

RATELS first box office went super no vacancy of 315 people crammed in to the venue. The event received positive reviews, with people commenting on how it was a lot of fun, it was a paradox because it was like Noah, but not like Noah at the same time, as you will no doubt discover below.
It was felt however that ShinjukuFACE might be a better venue next time.

First lucky 100 fans received a RATELS wristband, but each fan who entered was given a Noah fan and some confectionery. A somewhat stressed Daisuke Harada appeared to sign autographs beforehand.

I am going to attempt to put a summary of the show in bullet points below, as I don't have much information on some matches.

• Understandably the crowd was made up mostly of young women
• Tadasuke has dyed his hair blonde. People started calling him "Blonde Mother". YO-HEY will no doubt give a nickname later.
• Junta Miyawaki didn't get his first win, as it took Kaito Kiyomiya 8 minutes and 10 seconds to defeat him with the Boston Crab. Despite this, Junta Miyawaki was praised today for his performance. He said later that since he was eighteen he has been indebted to Kiyomiya (they have grown up together in the turbulent era of Noah), and wants to do a singles again someday. 
• Alexander Otsuka had his butt machine-gun chopped by Go Shiozaki ("the angry ass chop"), and Shiozaki also had his face shoved in it when Otsuka hooked him with his legs. Later, because Otsuka chose his wardrobe for the minimalist man, referee Nishinaga had to cover up his soft dangly parts. Nishinaga also put his hand in front of the sight of Otsuka's ass.
• Hi69 and SUSUMU did the XX pose. It has been commented on that Hi69 needs to let go of this or else he won't progress. Problem with that is that Hi69 was very dependent on Taiji Ishimori, and he still hasn't let go of him completely. 
• YO-HEY got out his phone to read the lyrics to Ikemen's theme music so he could sing along with it.
• HAYATA painted half of his face like Darth Maul
• Ikemen and YO-HEY hugged. HAYATA was probably on the lookout for any handshaking.
• Someone joked that when YO-HEY was being beaten up by HAYATA he was saying "Sorry! Sorry! Sorry, I partnered with someone else other than you, honey!" 
• Daisuke Harada ate a lot of Takashi Sugiura's elbows, and pulled both the Olympic Slam and the Katayama German Suplex on him (Harada is 5'6 1/2  and 80kg, and Sugiura is 5'10 and 104 kgs), and his strength was commented on. Sugiura victorious with the slam. Match was said to be BRUTAL.

RESULTS

Tadasuke vs KAZMA SAKAMOTO
KAZMA SAKAMOTO with a neck clutch (10 mins and 14 seconds)

Kaito Kiyomiya vs Junta Miyawaki
Kaito Kiyomiya with the Boston Crab (8 minutes and 10 seconds)

Go Shiozaki vs Alexander Otsuka
Go Shiozaki via disqualification (12 minutes and 28 seconds)

YO-HEY & Kuroshio Ikemen Jiro vs HAYATA & Seiki Yoshioka
HAYATA with Crossfix on YO-HEY (12 minutes and 12 seconds)

The Backbreakers (Hajime Ohara & Hitoshi Kumano) vs Hi69 & SUSUMU
HI69 with the Stuka Splash on Hitoshi Kumano (14 minutes and 56 seconds)

Daisuke Harada vs Takashi Sugiura
Takashi Sugiura via Olympic Slam (21 minutes and 59 seconds)